Spiritual Side Effects

We all know that medicine has side effects. Sometimes the side effects seem worse than what we take the medicine for! But still, we take our medicine diligently, confident that at some point we will get relief from our ailments.

It was one day when I was taking my morning buffet of pills that I realized how much my life had changed due to various side effects. One of my medicines made my food taste awful, causing me to change what I eat and eliminate many things I liked to eat. Another medicine made me woozy, causing me to stop driving. And I now use a walker, since my feet need a little help to get going. As I asked God to help me accept all the changes, I felt a shift in my prayer. I was no longer grieving; I was opening. I was opening to the graces God was giving me. Instead of the “couldn’ts” I had been focused on, God was enlightening me on the virtues I was developing.

That’s when I realized that these medicines don’t only have physical effects. They also have spiritual effects. Since I now have persnickety taste buds and have to watch my salt intake, I now cook most of my meals from scratch. (They still taste bad, but they’re healthy). This has given me a new appreciation for fresh food so easily available.

Not knowing how I’ll feel or what my energy level will be each day has given me a new perspective on ordinary things. I’m more grateful to do little things instead of whizzing through many activities on any given day. The things I do now are done with more thought, and I feel a sense of accomplishment when I finish. I no longer take things for granted.

I’m learning humility by asking for rides when I need to go somewhere. Instead of listening to talk shows on the car radio, I’m enjoying conversations with whomever is helping me to get where I need to go. I’m also learning patience as I wait for others to help me with things I can’t do myself. I don’t necessarily have everything at my disposal immediately, but I’ve learned that it’s quite all right to wait for something to get done.

Instead of focusing on what I can’t do, I think about the positive virtues I’m developing, such as humility, patience, and gratitude. Unlike the physical side effects that will discontinue when I’m done taking the medicines, the spiritual side effects will stay with me always, and that’s a good thing. As St. Ignatius taught, God is in all things, even in illness and the medicines we take. God’s grace can bring virtue out of our physical maladies.

What spiritual side effects have you experienced?

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